How To Focus on the Solution, Not the Problem! – Moxie On Monday

Have you ever noticed “life” always needs fixing?

I mean, there always seems to be … Problems.

They do indeed come with life.

So do solutions. 

We can’t control the problems. There will always be problems. Some will seem insurmountable, zapping your energy.

What can we control?

Finding solutions. Believing in our innate ability to solve problems.

It’s like that Midlife Philosopher Yoda said:

“There is no try. Only do.”

When a problem comes our way, one helpful way to view your latest obstacle is to tell yourself: “So what. What now?”

We choose to focus our energy on the solution and not the problem.

We don’t deny the problem exists.

Problems are real. 

Channeling our focus, our intention and our energy into finding a creative solution gives us the most energetic bang for the buck.

If we resist dealing with the obstacle we’re facing – we stick our heads in the sand or we resist dealing with the situation – the problem only grows bigger as do our stress levels.

This only adds to the problem!

I was dealing with a problem this past week. Well, not exactly my problem, but a challenging situation my daughter encountered. Her wedding is weeks away. An immensely important part of the wedding hit a roadblock: The alterations on her wedding dress were a disaster. She called me for help. We were in this together. 

I shared with her what I’ve learned to deal with major obstacles in my life – practices my spiritual teachers have taught me. 

I’ll never forget being at a weeklong retreat with Deepak Chopra. A woman stood up to share how angry she was with a situation that was happening in the world. 

At this moment, there are real world situations impacting all of us. 

Situations that can make us feel angry. 

Situations that are out of our control. 

Deepak let her speak. She was railing against a societal issue, one that was real and she was very very angry. He let her go off. And then, he stopped her. 

At this moment, Deepak gently guided her to see where her focus was – firmly on the problem. He helped her to shift her focus and her energies toward the solution – on the change she wanted to see in the world. She began to see that her current focus, her anger and her negative emotions, were only helping to fuel the problem. It was time to shift her focus to the solution. 

In essence, Deepak was saying: So what. What now?

I learned a lot in that moment. 

My daughter was dealing with a real world problem too. One that needed a solution. A very quick solution. We talked it through and she understood how she needed to focus her all her energies on a positive outcome. The more we talked, the more she believed that the universe was busy conspiring on her behalf. 

Things don’t happen to us. They happen for us. 

From that moment on, she shifted her focus. Talking about the issue wasn’t going to solve the problem. Most likely, it would keep her stuck in the problem, delaying the solution. 

She focused her energy on a more favorable outcome than would have happened if the problem hadn’t taken place. 

Somehow, she knew the obstacle was there to serve her. 

I shared some tips I’ve learned to keep her in a positive space, solely focusing on exactly what she wanted to achieve. 

Just over 48 hours later, she called me and she was ecstatic. Problem solved. The solution was way better than the initial plan. 

I’ve gone through a lot of challenges in my life. Life has thrown all kinds of obstacles my way. I’m sure it has for you too. 

What I’ve learned is the less I struggle with the problem, the more quickly I discover a solution. The more I focus on the outcome I wish to achieve, the easier the solution becomes and the quicker it comes to pass. 

Mastering Modern Midlife is about mastering ourselves. 

It’s mastering our mindset and our attitude. When we approach life, particularly any problem, challenge or obstacle with a positive attitude, focusing on the solution rather than the problem, life becomes so much easier. We learn to let go of negative emotions while solutions naturally find their way to us. 

Every problem has a solution. You might not like the solution, but there is always a way forward. 

You always have a choice. 

Choosing to focus on the problem or the solution. You know, when you find yourself in a hole, the first rule is … stop digging.

If you’re dealing with an issue in your life, here are some tips to shift your focus from the problem to the solution:

• Get another opinion. Choose a trusted friend to share your problem or issue with. If you don’t have someone to confide in, use your journal as your friend. Get your feelings out. Feel the anger. Feel the emotions. Get it all out! Put it in a box. Then close the box.
• Once you’ve let your feelings and frustrations out, make a commitment to end the story then and there. Once you’ve talked about it, there is no need to continue talking about the problem. Repeating the story only keeps the negative energy alive. It keeps the focus on the problem. 
• Commit to focusing on a positive solution. What do you want to achieve?
• Picture the solution in detail. What is the desired outcome you wish to achieve? See it. Feel it. Touch it. Taste it. Sense it with every one of your senses. 
• Visualize yourself with the solution in place – as if it has already happened. 
• Create an affirmation around your desired outcome. Use this positive affirmation any time your focus drifts to the problem or to repeating the story. 

Most importantly, let it go. Surrender this challenge to the universe while being sure to take the necessary steps toward the solution. Remember, the universe thinks so much bigger than our more limited human minds. The solution to your problem may be much better than you could ever imagine.

That happened for my daughter. 

Now, Let’s be real. Not every problem can be resolved in 48 hours. Some problems are much bigger than others. Some challenges take time. 

Regardless of the size of our problem, for every issue, challenge or obstacle, a solution exists. In the case of bigger issues, ones that need time to resolve, consider breaking the problem down into smaller steps. 

What’s one thing you can do today to begin to take a step in the direction of your desired outcome?

One step. That’s all you need for today. 

Baby steps, Beauties. 

Or as Davidji always says, “Bean by bean, the bag gets full.”

Cheers Beauties! S#*t happens. So what. What NOW?!?

If you’d like a treat, watch the video below … it just might be your new favorite song.