“If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor.” – Desmond Tutu

There are moments when I just don’t want to do what I do anymore.  It’s draining. I desire to make a difference, a meaningful difference in this crazy world, but I’m tired of feeling like I’m failing.

One of those moments took place this weekend. I’m almost embarrassed to share yet feel called to express what’s in my heart.

My emotions have been all over the place lately, vacillating from despair and hopelessness to joy and hopefulness. In a moment of feeling powerless, I reached out to a dear friend, Tamara Batsell – a wise soul with a beautiful heart who also happens to be a black woman. Tamara and I have been working together for some time. She’s someone I look up to – a powerful voice that I needed in the midst of chaos.

Within moments of hearing her voice and her grounded perspective on the recent protests and uprising centered around racism, I was in tears. I was a puddle of emotion as Tamara remained a powerful touchstone for me. She reminded me that recent events aren’t new for her. Racism is a daily reality. It’s given her a “thicker skin,” one that’s served her living as a Black woman in a racist world.

I poured out my heart to my sister, my friend. I was pained by powerlessness, feeling unable to make a difference, to move the needle on racism even within my own community – the backyard Tamara and I both play in regularly.

What led me down an emotional path was my latest blog post with a bold call to action asking my community to join me in taking a stand to be actively Anti-Racist and to celebrate our black community – to take that positive light we shine on Ageism and extend it toward our black sisters. There was also a selection of resources that were put together to help us all better understand racism and how we can change and help.

Almost no one in the community that I founded, our tribe with the kind vibe, seemed to care. The silence was deafening.

What added to my dismay and shock was the clear disinterest I received on my post and the call to action. Only a handful of people clicked through to the blog on a powerful post asking women to band together and declare themselves Anti-Racists in the midst of worldwide riots and protests. There was less than a tenth of the usual traffic.

That was eye opening. I also saw that more women unsubscribed from my email list in a single day than ever had before. Tamara wasn’t surprised. She reminded me of a favorite quote by Maya Angelou, “When people show you who they are, believe them.” She went on to say: “also thank them.” She told me that when I take a stand on racism as I have, I would most likely lose a large part of my audience. But, she also shared that the supporters who remain are the real ones, the important ones. In time, I would build a much bigger platform, one that’s authentic, diverse, and inclusive.

Looking back, I suppose I’ve been naive. Shifting paradigms isn’t easy. It takes time. It takes patience. It’s hard work. Many don’t want to come along. Many foolishly see racism as politicized, and let’s be real … in today’s theater of the absurd political climate, any commentary that appears to be political is going to piss off half your audience.

Making headway on racism is a long term proposition. 

Let’s be clear. I’m in for the long term!

For me, my dismay wasn’t about the numbers, losing subscribers or a large part of my audience. The sadness was in seeing the truth, understanding that all women, Fierce women, don’t wish to join me to be actively anti-racist.

Tamara’s final words were: “Perhaps it’s time to disconnect, take time for you and focus on joy.” The irony wasn’t lost on me. In the midst of a country in pain, divided over racism, an issue Tamara has dealt with her entire life, she was the one calming me. By the end of the call, I felt hope returning. I felt my heart perk up a bit.

One thing I know for sure is the times when we change the most are often the most painful times of our lives. Challenges and suffering force us to break open. It’s only when we are broken open that we can search deep within and begin to heal.

Tamara reminded me that this is not an easy path. Racism is part of our culture. It takes time to unwind it. Sometimes, a lot more time than we have in our lifetime. What I’m learning is some people will be open to joining me and working to be actively Anti-Racist and some won’t. The ones who choose to join me I’ll welcome with open arms and open hearts. To the others, I’ll thank them for showing me who they are and send them on their way. The Forever Fierce Revolution is the Tribe With the Kind Vibe, one that has no room and zero tolerance for racism of any kind.

I am so grateful that I have a Sister to lean on.

I shared this with another amazing Sister, Lana Lindgren, and her response was so wonderful, it deserves it’s own place here:

“I wish I could spend the day talking to Tamara. I feel such a connection to her words. Thank you for this reminder. ” – Lana

Women like Tamara give me hope. Women like Tamara make me want to fight the good fight until the end, to do what I can as a white woman in a racist world to leave this world a better place, one that’s more accepting and inclusive, one that’s Forever Fierce and filled with Moxie.

In the end, it doesn’t take an enormous number of people to change the world. It comes down to humans with conviction, Fierce women who don’t quit, kind hearts who are in for the long haul. I want to extend my gratitude to those kind hearts who have stepped forward, to those Fierce Sisters who are right there beside me fighting the good fight, the only fight that matters. Let’s do this together.

If you are interested in joining a developing “movement within a movement,” and taking a stand to end complacency and step into being actively anti-racist, please follow Tamara @tbstyleworks and in the Forever Fierce Revolution Community. She leads a powerful “Transparent Tuesday” Facebook Live at 5:30 pm PST. If you missed her live last week, you can find it here to inspire you to fight the good fight.

Cheers Beauties! Will you join me in changing this crazy world as this crazy world needs some changing?

Need More Moxie?! See all my Moxie On Monday’s!

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I’m just catching up this week as I took some time to remove myself from all of the unrest in the world right now. I needed to step away and center myself. I took time to count the endless blessings that I have right now and reflect on how I can make a difference in this changing world.

Your passion and message are very important and resonate with myself as well as many others. Don’t be discouraged as you are doing great things! It is interesting that often times we as humans need a real shakeup like the pandemic, racial protesting, death of a loved one, divorce etc. to give us reason to pause and consider how to move forward. We all need a shift in direction.

I’m with you and all of my fellow sisters in making this a better world and for looking for the serendipity in everyday living.


Thank you so much sister! I’m definitely not giving and more committed than ever before to do my part. I appreciate you so much. Without my sisters, I couldn’t do what I do. Changing the world isn’t easy and it’s a whole lot more fun with my sisters.


Oh Catherine! I wish I had taken the time to comment on your post on Saturday, as was one if the most powerful posts I’d read over the past few weeks. I wanted to thank you for your honesty as well as the link to Tamara’s live post from Tuesday, which I then watched in it’s entirety, AND then made sure I was following Tamara on all social media channels. Your post was the one thing that I read over the weekend that added some clarity for me. It made me think and reflect from your perspective, which was bold and heartfelt. I’m with you 100% and please keep writing and sharing, we are listening.


I’m grateful for your support sister. Sometimes, I have to take a step back to see where I can serve best moving forward. I’m not giving up. I’m more committed than ever before to making a difference in this crazy world. I just want to do it the right way, the most conscious way that will make a real difference. Thank you so much!


Everything you do comes from a place of love and kindness. Continue to shine your light and share your passion with everyone who stands with you. Tamara is a fierce sister and she is definitely someone to lean on when you feel like you are fighting an uphill battle. All the people of color around this world feel they have been fighting an uphill battle for centuries and it is time we support them. I do feel we are at a turning point in this world. There is a shift taking place and it is about time. Love you so much for sharing your big heart with the world and with me. Hugs sunshine.


We spent Friday night, Juneteenth, watching the netflix documentary, 13th. It was crazy. I could not believe how much we weren’t taught in school or in our families about slavery, about the civil war, about all of it. Understanding the past is the key to changing the future. There is a shift taking place sister and I will definitely do my part sweet one.


Like Tamara, I was not surprised at ALL to see the lack of response on that post. I knew you would take a hit on your following as many others are experiencing who are bravely speaking up and calling out the injustice. Here’s what I think: Any community is strengthened when weak links are removed. So you’re wise not to be bothered by those whose choose to leave. It’s simply a matter of different values.


It’s ok to loose followers, it’s more than ok. People come into our life for a reason a season and a lifetime. We are all here to learn and you have created a space of love and joy. Our job is to let go of judgment with grace. Follow our heart and that makes room for wonderful people to show up for the Journey.
Tamara is a wise soul, she rocked that stage at your event!
Thanks for sharing ❤️Love to us all! Xo Janet


Thanks for your thoughts. I hope you understand my dismay wasn’t in losing followers. That’s never been my focus. It was about the message I felt it was giving me. I have always believed in actively encouraging inclusion and diversity. You’ve been to two FierceCons where the voices of black women speak loudly for a reason – they have incredible wisdom to share, a perspective on life that we need as well as having other women in the black community see themselves reflected. What many of us are seeing now is an uprising by the black community as well as the white community, mostly in support. I intend to continue a slow and steady approach supporting the black community and every other marginalized community within FFR. I appreciate you. I know your heart and it’s beautiful to me!


I am so very with you my friend…100% and for the long haul. xo


And I am forever grateful.


What’s happening at this time– pandemic, discussions and violence regarding racial inequality are really all one.
The United States is at a point where it has to reinvent itself. The United States was founded with true vision for its time. Pluto is returning to the degree of the U S chart.
Police violence is part of it but so is why are so many people left behind? How do you fix it and not leave anyone behind? It’s part of a pandemic because it is world wide. 45 percent of the people worldwide live under a dictator. Many people feel powerless.
Babies born with drugs in their system who are immediately at a disadvantage, generations of prejudice left unchecked, unwillingness to pay taxes for programs that offer support. Networks, unions, organizations that protect or look the other way.
This is huge and the next few years will be telling.
Now is not the time to forget about speaking out but I’m sure I’m not the only one who realizes this is not simple.
The sign where Pluto is will expose the truth. Currently authority and government.


Yes, there is a lot happening in the cosmos and with consciousness. Hoping we will end up in a better place, a higher level of consciousness and understanding. I know it is also about ending the abuse of power that fuels the corruption.


Tamara is a voice of reason and had wonderful thoughts to share!! I loved listening to her the other day.


She is exactly what I needed to hear too sister!


Speaking only for myself, I’m finding myself overwhelmed and under-informed this past week. Trying to like and comment on something that, while I am so very passionate about, I’m learning that I’m not nearly as aware as I thought I was resulted in taking a step back – feeling that if I don’t have anything of value to add to a conversation, then I should just read and reflect. I realize now, that was a mistake. Rather, I should be at least commenting to people like you, thanking you for opening up the conversation and helping to keep the momentum. The good news is that there is a lot of information out there, and I’m trying to thoughtfully and thoroughly take it all in. Like Julie, I agree that this has been intense. I think that is a good thing because the intensity is causing things to happen – good things, yet also bad things, but hopefully in the end, more good than bad. I can’t imagine what so many people have endured and are still enduring. Like you, I want to do something that helps and makes a difference. Looking back on last week was a blur – we are trying to transition back into the office, I had a college grad move back home (without a job, which is making him frustrated) and the concerns of our health and our communities. Yet, in reflecting on this it makes me realize how small and insignifcant these concerns are compared to what our black brothers and sisters have had to endure for years. Thank you for this wake-up call. I, too, promise I am with you 100% now and forever.


I hear you, sister. Tamara shared that as well. We’ve been back and forth for some time checking in on one another. There is definitely overwhelm and exhaustion. Slow and steady wins the race. An ongoing conscious path forward is better than jumping in when emotions are heightened. I’ll continue to do my part with my steadfast support of our black sisters only stronger and brighter! I appreciate you more than you know.


Not surprising… sad, but not surprising. When you rock a boat, people fall out. It’s ok they weren’t the agile, fit ones that could hang on. xoxo


Totally agree. You know I love to shake things up. It’s never been about numbers, metrics or the size of my following. I’ll take 2 authentic courageous souls over 1000 followers who are inauthentic or lack the courage to take a stand and use their voice to support the marginalized voices. I know where your heart is and I’m grateful to stand with you!


I will join you! I’m taking a stand as well. Thank you for your ongoing dedication to making a difference. xo


I know you are!


Hi I was introduced to you this week through your podcasts. Started with your 2018 ones and your interview with Nanine. Really spoke to me.

I live in South Africa where racism was institutionalised and race is the fabric which weaves our disparate, angry, passionate, hopeful, messy society together. Mix that with a class and wealth divide which is one of the worst in the world.

I liked this post. Don’t really know your other stuff yet. Looks fascinating so far.


Hello Nicole, it’s so nice to meet you. Welcome to the blog. Have you joined the Forever Fierce Revolution where we have women from all over the world including your neck of the woods. Of course you know what is happening all too well. I have watched in horror in South Africa in the past. I am so sorry from a collective heart – the oppression, the abuse, all of it. It hurts my heart. I will be doing my part and I welcome your input and support. I see you. I stand with you!


Please don’t lose hope. Your message, your leadership, and your light are VITAL! I will speak only for myself in saying that there has been so much, so fast, and so intensely, that I need a little time to take it all in, even if it seems like we don’t have time to waste! But I promise I am with you
100 % – now and forever!


It’s beautiful souls like you that help me to continue fighting the good fight!

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